Refund policy

Returns & Refunds

General Policy

All sales are final. This is less a policy than a philosophy.

That said, we understand that mistakes happen — mostly on the buyer's end, but still. If you contact us within 30 days of receiving your item, we'll listen. We may not act, but we'll listen.

Eligibility

To be considered for a return, your item must be in the same condition you received it. For most of our products, this means "questionable." If the item has degraded further under your care, that's between you and the item now.

You'll also need proof of purchase. We recommend screenshots, as we may not remember the transaction.

How to Request a Return

Email info@object9.com with the subject line "I Have Regrets." Include your order number and a brief explanation of what went wrong. We will review your case with the seriousness it deserves.

If your return is accepted — and we want to be clear, this is not guaranteed — we'll provide further instructions. Items sent back without prior approval will be donated, discarded, or displayed as a cautionary example.

Damages and Issues

Please inspect your order upon arrival. If the item is defective, damaged, or not what you ordered, contact us immediately. We will evaluate the situation and respond with something between empathy and indifference, depending on the day.

Non-Returnable Items

The following items cannot be returned:

• Perishable goods (including the Tupperware of Unknown Origin, which should not have been opened)
• Items described as "mystery" anything
• Products that have been used, worn, or emotionally bonded with
• Gift cards
• Services already rendered, poorly or otherwise

Exchanges

We do not offer direct exchanges. If you want something different, return the original item (see above) and place a new order. This is inefficient by design.

Refunds

If a refund is approved, it will be processed within 10 business days to your original payment method. Please allow additional time for your bank to post the refund. If more than 15 business days have passed, contact us — though at that point, we recommend accepting the loss and moving on.

European Union Customers

If you're in the EU, you have 14 days to cancel or return your order for any reason. We respect this. The item must be in original condition, tags attached, unworn, unused, and returned with proof of purchase. We will process your return with quiet, continental efficiency.

Questions?

Contact info@object9.com. We'll respond when we can.